Now that the news are out, I can't shake the feeling of a letdown. Now, before I'm swamped with counter-arguments in support of the new developments, let me clarify that I:
a) have a 2-week-old P85,
b) love it so far, and
c) am, in general, very pro-Tesla.
That said, let me present my list of points that leads me to the statement in the post title.
1. First and foremost, no retrofitting of the AWD. I don't even know where to begin with this, it bites on so many fronts. My car is suddenly not super-advanced, just simply advanced, not ultra-fast, just very fast, and it even has less range! Feelings aside, it will undoubtedly affects the resale value, and not in a positive way.
2. Second, no retrofitting of the sensors. Again with many ways this bites. Downgraded to just advanced, and, more importantly, from super-safe to just very safe. And, again, resale value ("-Does it have those cool automatic gizmos? -Umm...no... -Okay then, let's discuss the price.") And unlike the very selfish nature of the first point, this is safety features we are talking about. Knowing that you can go to 60 faster than almost any other car is good, knowing that your car will try extra hard to keep you out of trouble is somewhat more essential. The ability to whistle for your car is just a bonus.
I do have the resale guarantee, and I do realize that a car, no matter how outstanding, is a depreciating asset, it doesn't help much. But let's suppose it somehow works out, and the effects are not as drastic. Let's even suppose that I sell/trade in the P85 I have, and decide to get the advantage of all the new features... wait a bit.
3. What do you mean you can't have a P85D with 19 wheels? Why does it even matter? I can get an S60D, I can get an S85D. Why can't I opt out of all the '+' features, and just get the second motor on the P85 with 19 wheels? A somewhat minor point, I know, but it does matter to me, and it does add to the sense of disappointment.
Yes, public presentations are not always fully indicative of how things are going to go (*coughbatteryswappingcough*), and Tesla has been known to cater not only for new clients, but also for the old ones. But at this instance, the whole thing is a disappointment for me.
Forgot about this one:
4. No news of Model X
Since there were (not unexpectedly) quite a few comments comparing Model S to tech gadgets, and mentioning first-world problems, I realized I put too much weight on the D features in my post. In fact, the D features can come or go, they are nice but not essential, even the base S60 is plenty fast. So let me restate my main concern here in a number of shorter points.
1. I just missed a major feature.
2. I just missed a major safety-related feature.
3. By roughly a week, or a couple hundred VINs.
4. No, it won't be delivered by a software update (unlike most prior features).
5. No, I can't get it retrofitted even if I'm willing to pay for it.
6. Even though it's now a 'no added cost' option for vastly expanded functionality (price-wise, new tech package == old tech package + parking sensors).
7. The new hardware was rolled out quietly, with no announcements whatsoever.
8. With at least some people in the know about forthcoming hardware rollout, you would expect, or at least hope that someone reaching out and asking "hey, we are preparing a new and exciting package, would you want to wait for a couple of weeks to get it?". After almost three months' wait, an extra two weeks or even an extra month don't matter that much.
9. In fact, the delivery happened about a week earlier than initially assigned.
10. Net result: feeling cheated through not even being offered a choice at any stage.