1) Someone named Dan is the Tesla Model 3 forum monitor
2) Dan is told to monitor the forum, but never ever answer any questions and never ever ever make a post
3) Dan does what he is told for years and years
4) Dan read the posts every day and gets very frustrated that Model 3 owners get to let off a little steam by posting about issues with the most advanced car ever built. Dan loves Tesla and loves his car, but wants to let off a little steam too.
5) Dan makes a post in that regard. Dan forgets his user name is tattooed with the Tesla logo
6) Totally by coincidence Elon makes a tweet soliciting input as to how to improve Tesla (actual tweet:
7) Someone responds, suggesting best way to improve Tesla is to keep idiotic employees from posting to the Tesla forums
8) Elon checks out the accusation.. finds Dan's post... freaks out. Elon has three big buttons next to his bed: The first button is labeled SEND SIGNAL TO SHUTDOWN ALL TESLA'S EVERYWHERE IN CASE OF ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE. The second button is labeled DO WHATEVER I AM THINKING RIGHT NOW. The third button is labeled I'M TIRED OF ALL THE WHINING IN THE MODEL 3 FORUM SO IRRETRIEVABLY DELETE ALL POSTS FROM THE BEGINNING OF TIME.
9) Elon wants to delete only Dan's post and reaches for button number two. But in his exuberance over reaches to button number 3.
10) To cover his tracks and not reveal how important it was to delete Dan's post, Elon instead of firing Dan, promotes him to VP in charge of installing a 4th button, labeled UNDO.