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Why I bought a Tesla Model S instead of a horse, an elephant, or a mule

Why I bought a Tesla Model S instead of a horse, an elephant, or a mule

I don't have enough hay to charge the horse with, the elephant's trunk has limited capacity, and the mule stalls too often.

If this were a few thousand years ago, I'd reject the Tesla because, you know . . . potholes . . .

dglauz | June 23, 2014

Potholes? I would think it would be lack of charging infrastructure. Kite and thunderstorms would be too unreliable.

mrspaghetti | June 23, 2014

Hey, why don't you go on a Horse, Elephant and Mule forum to post this, buddy?!

Mathew98 | June 23, 2014

I bought a Tesla despite having a jackass at home. Hopefully, my teenager will eventually be upgraded to a donkey in due time...

johncrab | June 23, 2014

Good one!

PBEndo | June 23, 2014

A horse, an elephant and a mule walk into a bar....

NKYTA | June 23, 2014

...and the bartender says to the horse, "what'll you have?"...

Tiebreaker | June 23, 2014

Did you have any issues with the interior of those three?

PBEndo | June 23, 2014

And the bartender says "Why the long faces?"

TeslaTap.com | June 23, 2014

I also considered horse, an elephant, or a mule, but the emissions were a major turn off. Every mile you have to get off and shovel the stuff off the road! I guess it's not that much difference from an ICE that puts those pounds of crap into the air we breath.

Bighorn | June 23, 2014

We have some extra hay--$95/ton.

PBEndo | June 23, 2014

I don't think it is fair to include the mule in this comparison since it is a hybrid.

NKYTA | June 23, 2014

Awesome @pbendo. :-)

hcwhy | June 23, 2014

So what did then horse. mule and elephant say?

rapoport3a | June 23, 2014

They said (in unison), "We've ordered a Model S that we have to wait 2000 years for."

Jonathan C. | June 23, 2014

@pbendo Hahahah, I almost fell of the chair hehehe.

HenryT2 | June 23, 2014

@PBEndo
LOL. Wouldn't have thought of that!

Captain_Zap | June 23, 2014

@BH

$95 a ton? Not bad. I wish we could get it here using Superchargers.

jjs | June 23, 2014

@PBEndo Classic. :)

Bighorn | June 23, 2014

@Zap
Friends and family discount--round bales.

I think PBEndo wins the internet today:)

PBEndo | June 23, 2014

What's the prize, a ton of hay?

Bighorn | June 23, 2014

What's it gonna take to put you on this here horse?

pabeader | June 23, 2014

Lube, lots of lube.

pabeader | June 23, 2014

Sorry, I read that as "in the here horse"

NomoDinos | June 23, 2014

This thread just made my day. Well played, folks.

Captain_Zap | June 23, 2014

@BH -

Well, I don't need anything fancy like a saddle, parking sensors or cup holders.

Bareback & a hackmore would do me fine. You see, MY horse was a high performance cutting horse.

Now, all we have out in the field is a bunch of fancy, lazy Russian Arabian racing brood mares. All show, no go.

lolachampcar | June 23, 2014

you guys and gals really crack me up....
Every now and then I read one of these threads and simply SMILE. Thank you!

AmpedRealtor | June 23, 2014

I'd like a Tesla Model Ass please...

renwo S alset | June 23, 2014

and the bartender asks "which one of you 3 is a lawyer?"

PBEndo | June 23, 2014

Is the bartender blind? wouldn't it be obvious?

renwo S alset | June 23, 2014

Ahh butterfly, nothing in life is obvious...

Red Sage ca us | June 23, 2014

The elephant says, "I think I remember this joke..."

renwo S alset | June 23, 2014

The horse says, "with a memory that good you should be a judge..."

Red Sage ca us | June 23, 2014

To which the bartender replies, "What is this... Some kind of joke?"

Captain_Zap | June 24, 2014

Ivory is so last season.

mrspaghetti | June 24, 2014

Best thread in a while, you guys are in rare form

Rocky_H | June 24, 2014

At least with the Tesla you can get textile seats. Those other options come with leather, and you can't change it.

But I guess those other options all run on solar to make their fuel, so you won't have to put up with the "coal-powered" comments from haters.

And the salesman says, "I've got a saddle right here with your name on it."

Holy cow, PBendo, that mule=hybrid comment was freakin' amazing!

Haeze | June 24, 2014

This makes me think... If Back to the Future had featured a Tesla instead of a DeLorean, then Back to the Future III would have been a very short movie... just push the Tesla in front of a train for as long as you need to charge it up, then drive it to 88MPH anywhere flat enough.

Velo1 | June 24, 2014

But, but how did the bartender know if they were all 21 or older?

What do you call an elephant riding in a Tesla?

A passenger.

bmilesfl33 | June 24, 2014

LOL. Great thread.

PBEndo | June 24, 2014

Try the veal. Tip your waitress. I'll be here all week.......

Bobrrr | June 24, 2014

I would go with the horse. It gas a better interior.

PBEndo | June 24, 2014

Gas???

Bighorn | June 25, 2014

You have to wonder if the elephant would have had more success if he had marketed his frunk? Word of mouth campaign would have cost peanuts.

renwo S alset | June 25, 2014

Elephant has two really big coat hangers, obvious winner in my book.

Rocky_H | June 25, 2014

The elephant has such a high center of gravity, though.

Captain_Zap | June 25, 2014

You are leaving out some serious contenders.

You can put a nice saddle on the hump of a camel. Think of the possibilities for an opportunity console!

Kangaroos have very convenient storage pockets. But, I think they require premium hay.

AmpedRealtor | June 25, 2014

Do those humps come with decent cup holders, though?

renwo S alset | June 25, 2014

Cup holder? What about the bed pans?

AmpedRealtor | June 25, 2014

Yo momma's garage is a tent!

rapoport3a | June 25, 2014

In the original post, I thought of including a camel. But, you know, one hump or two . . . @Velo1, they don't have to be 21, 'cause there's a 19 option.

Also gotta consider the aerodynamics. It's a horse race, for sure.

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