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@SCCR: Why sad Americans should consider moving to Tasmania, not Canada

@SCCR: Why sad Americans should consider moving to Tasmania, not Canada

http://www.abc DOT net DOT au/news/2016-11-10/donald-trump-dear-sad-americans-forget-canada-come-to-tasmania/8012730?section=tas

How could I say it better?

Ross1 | 13. november 2016

Lol, maybe by printing out the article
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US Election: Tasmanian makes the case for sad Americans to choose Tasmania, not Canada
By James Dunlevie
Posted Thu at 6:00pm

Big Tasmanian Devil at Mole Creek, Tasmania
PHOTO: Tasmania has everything Canada has to offer and more for disgruntled Americans. (AAP: Tourism Australia)
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MAP: TAS
James Dunlevie makes a tongue-in-cheek pitch to Americans feeling dismayed, at best, about the election of Donald Trump to the US presidency.

The election of Donald Trump to the American presidency has delighted many but shocked others, none more so than Americans pinning their hopes on Hillary Clinton.

Canada's Justin Trudeau and Tasmania's Will Hodgman, side by side.
PHOTO: Canada's Justin Trudeau and Tasmania's Will Hodgman lead the way. (ABC News)
Canada's immigration website crashed under the weight of enquiries before the Trump victory was even official, such was the panic at the thought of The Donald taking over the White House.

So, with Canada off the menu, may I suggest disgruntled Americans consider Tasmania as an alternate destination?

We are not too different to Canada and we have a lot of stuff that could pass off as American.

Don't believe me? Read on.

(NOTE TO ALARMED TASMANIANS - Hey, our economy is in the doldrums, more people can only be a good thing, right? You got a better idea? Let's hear it!)

Critters

We do cute animals in Tasmania, and feisty too.

Tasmania has penguins, eagles, dolphins, dogs, cats, spiders, ants, all the usual gear.

We also have Tasmanian devils. They're lovely, you Americans will like them, just watch out for their teeth.

While Canada has the moose, in Tasmania we have something called a pademelon, which is kind of like a huge rat. Don't worry, they mainly congregate in the "bush", which is Tasmanian for "forest".

Tasmanian Georgia Love, the 2016 Bachelorette contestant.
PHOTO: Georgia Love, a Tasmanian, was the 2016 Bachelorette. (Supplied)
We used to have Tasmanian tigers but we killed them all because they ate all the sheep. We now have lots of sheep.

Some still believe the Tasmanian tiger exists somewhere in the mountains, just like Bigfoot!

Hot politicians and people

Canada's Justin Trudeau may be a devastatingly handsome man who has a gender-balanced Cabinet, welcomes refugees, explains quantum physics and is an all-round superhero, but we have Premier Will Hodgman who, when Tasmania was described as a land of dregs, bogans and third-generation morons, hit back by saying such comments are "out of step with what the vast majority of people are saying". Take that!

Anyway, as the saying goes: "politics is show business for ugly people". Hotties really have no place in high office.

Generally speaking, Tasmanian people are regarded as being extremely good looking, so much so that one Tasmanian woman, Georgia Love, aka The Bachelorette, recently had no fewer than 16 men vying for her attention over the course of several TV weeks.

A skyscraper

Wrest Point tower stands out in the Hobart amber sunset.
PHOTO: Tasmania has one skyscraper, with another planned soon. (Instagram/tassiegrammer)
Tasmania has one tallish building of 73 metres (240 feet), which admittedly is no Trump Tower (202 metres, 664 feet), but that would work in its favour as far as some Americans are concerned, am I right?

I can confirm there are plans to build a 120-metre (393 feet) building in Hobart very soon, so we have that big city thing covered.

Yacht racing

Tasmania can do "rich man's sport" just as well as the USA.

You have the America's Cup and we have the Sydney To Hobart, which is a big deal not only in Tasmania but in Sydney as well.

And while the start of our race may be in Sydney, it is the end part which is important, and that happens in Hobart, Tasmania.

Americans might remember that Australia won the America's Cup, once in 1983, and we have done our best to not let America forget it.

Americans have won the Sydney to Hobart ten times, the most recent being last year, but our win 33 years ago is still better because we were the underdogs and everyone loves a winner who comes from behind against the odds, don't they?

Except in the case of Donald Trump, of course.

Sydney to Hobart overall winner, Victoire, sails through Storm Bay as it approaches Hobart.
PHOTO: The best part of the Sydney to Hobart race, the end, happens in Tasmania. (ABC News: Kathy McLeish)
The great outdoors

Wallaby and joey beside beach with azure water
PHOTO: Everyone is happy on the beach in Tasmania. (ABC Open contributor backcountryblissadventures)
The Grand Canyon, Yosemite, Niagara Falls are all great, but Tasmania has enough spectacular scenery to make sad Americans feel right at home.

Forests - Tasmania has them. Beautiful beaches - Tasmania is surrounded by them, by virtue of being an island.

Almost everything the USA has in terms of outdoors attractions Tasmania also has, albeit much, much smaller.

Vacations (we call them holidays) in Tasmania are often spent hiking (we call it bushwalking) or driving around in RVs (camper vans) or in tents (tents).

Seriously, this place is great for all of your outdoor adventure needs, although it can get cold so bring a sweater (jumper).

Admittedly Canada also has the outdoors, so it is a bit of a toss up on this one.

Aurora Australis from the summit of Hartz Mountain in southern Tasmania, by Instagram @shaunmittwollen.
PHOTO: You cannot see the Aurora Australis from Canada. (Instagram/shaunmittwollen)
Beer

Yes, we have plenty of this.

Hamburgers

No problem there. Beware of the pineapple, though.

Reality TV

It's taken us a while to catch up, but yes, we have this too.

Sport

Tasmanian batsman Alex Doolan
PHOTO: Cricket; just like baseball, but slower. (AAP: Dale Cummings)
Loads of it here, much of it quite similar to what you would be used to in the USA. Here in Tasmania there is cricket (a bit like baseball), footy (kind of like gridiron, which you know as NFL), soccer (the English kind), tennis (exactly the same) and all sorts of other pastimes.

We even have ice hockey, although it is not an official religion here as it is in Canada.

Shock jocks

No one can compete with the US on this and we don't even try. You can probably dial up some imported opinions from the big smoke (Sydney or Melbourne), but right now they are probably talking non-stop about Donald Trump, so when you look at it that way, Tasmania really is the place to be.

The Tasmanian tiger was declared extinct in the 1930s.
PHOTO: Some are convinced the thylacine, or Tasmanian tiger, still roams the Tasmanian bush.
For US citizens thinking about choosing Tasmania over Canada, it may not entirely be to your liking though.

We drive on the left, take milk in our coffee not cream, we walk on the footpath not the sidewalk, we do not have a trillion TV channels and we like things to be quiet, in general. Leave your guns at home.

Actually, now that I think about it, this place is fine just the way it is.

Hey, I think the Canadian immigration website is back up again.

Walkers at the Three Capes track, Tasmania.
PHOTO: The Three Capes coast, better than Big Sur. (Supplied: threecapestrack.com.au)
Topics: us-elections, world-politics, tas, united-states

Contact James Dunlevie

More stories from Tasmania

EaglesPDX | 13. november 2016

@Ross "Tasmania has everything Canada has to offer and more for disgruntled Americans."

But it doesn't offer the epic 21st battle against evil that opposing the minority president Trump and the GOP vigilantes provides in the US. Hydra has taken over the government and Captain America needs our help to take it back.

kevin | 13. november 2016

I read an article suggesting Boston in stead of Canada. They have universal health care and many other benefits. Also there is less immigration hassle.

SCCRENDO | 13. november 2016

@Ross. LOL. Your mollum is irritataing but here is the link
http://www.abc.net.au/news/2016-11-10/donald-trump-dear-sad-americans-fo...
I joke about moving but I'm saying. Would love to visit Tasmania at some point. Thanks for the link. These boards are dominated by Americans. I believe that these may be useful forums for some of the real bigots who hate foreigners to learn that other Tesla owners live in cool places and are human beings like us. Perhaps getting to know people will reduce some of the bigotry

SCCRENDO | 13. november 2016

Staying not saying

Ethan_M | 14. november 2016

@SCCRENDO - agree w/what you said.

Getting to know the unknown at the least ought to lead to tolerance- and best case scenario to enduring friendships.

Dramsey | 14. november 2016

Apparently virtually all of the celebrities who swore to leave the country if Trump was elected are in fact staying.

And how come everyone's talking about moving to Canada? What's wrong with Mexico, you racists?

Dramsey | 14. november 2016
lilbean | 14. november 2016

@Dramsey, I saw that. Haha! I'll help those celebrities pack. :)

SCCRENDO | 14. november 2016

@Dramsey. Leaving the US was just a cynical comment when none of us believed for a moment that Trump could win. Actually I do not see a problem with retiring to Mexico. Better weather than Canada. Nice people. Cheap cost of living and I speak Spanish. Popular retirement spots for Americans include Mexico, Costa Rica and Panama

lilbean | 14. november 2016

No excuses for people who talk crap and make stupid threats about leaving the country. They should put their money where their mouth is. Just do it. Who needs them here.

McLary | 14. november 2016

Why would anyone think that Canada wants them? IDIOTS!

Dramsey | 14. november 2016

@SCCRENDO,

Leaving the US was just a cynical comment when none of us believed for a moment that Trump could win.

Bryan Cranston: "Absolutely. I will definitely move."
Chelsea Handler: "...all of these people that threaten to leave the country and then don't, I will leave the country,"
Raven-Symone: "I literally bought my ticket, I swear."
Lena Dunham: “I know a lot of people have been threatening to do this, but I really will.”

There are others, but you get the idea. Sounds to me like a lot of moral cowards.

lilbean | 14. november 2016

Yep and yep!!

SCCRENDO | 14. november 2016

@Dramsey. Well I guess it's their democratic right to change their minds.

codyb12889 | 14. november 2016

Note to self:

When the deportation force comes around claim to be an illegal immigrant from Tasmania for free ticket.

SCCRENDO | 14. november 2016

@cody. I guess the ticket is one way and you would probably then have to prove your citizenship to come back. A birth certificate may not always be good enough for Trump. Ask Obama.

lilbean | 14. november 2016

Lol you guys!

codyb12889 | 14. november 2016

@SCCRENDO

One way is fine but I have to figure out some possibly uncomfortable places to hide my passport to show them when I get there so I don't end up in a man without a country scenario.

RedShift | 14. november 2016

"What's wrong with Mexico, you racists?"

Spanish, tough to master. Skiing, better in Canada. Some people might also prefer colder weather to hot.

RedShift | 14. november 2016

"There are others, but you get the idea. Sounds to me like a lot of moral cowards."

Do you know this nut called Ted Nugent?

Apparently cowardice isn't just limited to those limo liberals. I'm sure there are others like him.

compchat | 15. november 2016

@Sccrendo.

It's really telling that when you attack loyal American Citizens and they fight back you label them as bigots. According ot you anyone who voted for President Trump is a bigot, womenhating xenophobe. No wonder you draw the ire of many loyal Trump fans (which I'm certain you enjoy).

" Actually I do not see a problem with retiring to Mexico"

Mexico is also ridden with crime, mobs, gangs, poverty and infectious diseases. Try speaking out against the mob boss in Mexico and your head will be on a stick pretty quick. You're very lucky to have received citzen status in the best county in the world. If you don't believe the U.S. is the best country in the world perhaps you should stay in Mexico for six months and test your ideas. Stop complaining about President Trump without first giving him a chance. To keep your mind occupied I would suggest to you that you learn about the Clinton family crimes. I'm still wondering if President Trump will prosecute her when he takes office in January. I suspect he won't want to stir the pot but the trial would have been bigger than OJs.

Now, get on you kness and thank G_D that you are an American Citizen. Buy an American Flag and fly it every day.

My father didn't fight in WWII to have people like you spew anti-American rhetoric. Or, you have the option, to move back to South Africa.

lilbean | 15. november 2016

Interestingly enough, many of the people saying #notmypresident are indeed correct because they are not US citizens. #justsayin'

lilbean | 15. november 2016

This pretty much says it all for me.
Proud to be an American.
Thank you to all those who fought and gave their lives for us.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=vEDdAI_soPM

codyb12889 | 15. november 2016

@compchat

Saying it is wrong for someone to question the incoming leader and they should bow down and give their thanks is the absolute definition of tyranny. You play high and mighty screaming be patriotic but just remember that this country was founded by individuals that knew there was something better to be had than just submitting to the government of the time.

It has been said that soon after the creation of the Declaration of Independence Thomas Jefferson said "The cost of liberty is eternal vigilance." Maybe you should give that some thought before you essentially say, "Let's just give the man that has proven willing to screw anyone in his path for his benefit time to prove that history wrong."

The president elect has not even taken office and the EPA has already been sold to the highest bidder.

Myron Ebell has made millions of dollars acting as a fake scientist and figure head for the oil and coal industries to fight against the "lies" on climate change. His tactics range from outright lying on what a consensus of scientists believes on the subject to attacking anyone that speaks against his donors.

While you may or may not believe in climate change the simple fact is this is a man that has proven to be bought and paid for by big oil and big coal who will say anything to anyone to get his paycheck at the end of the day. If that is what supporters of the president elect consider draining the swamp then we are all in serious trouble.